leadership

As seniors I know many of us feel as though we need to be leaders. What some people don't realize is there is good leadership and bad leadership.  When you look up the definition of leadership one of the synonyms is dictator. You must understand, Hitler was a leader. A good one? Not necesarily.  Trying to be leaders is great and stepping up as seniors is what we are called to do but this can be appraoched in the wrong way. Don't expect people to just "13ow down." You must approach the task with humility. You are no better than anyone. 

I encourage any fellow seniors to step up in the new year. Reach out, lead, be an example, be daring, and have fun. Make the most of these next few months before we all head off in our seperate ways. Reach out to the underclassmen, help them discover how to be a leader, be an example of a good leader and others will follow, be daring! you are young embrace it, and have fun! live it up, it's your senior year. 

prayer request

I know that blogs are usually people telling stories but in my attempt to share my heart with you guys I want to ask you for prayer for something that has impacted me a lot during this week. I think I am at the point where I am confident enough to share with you a struggle that I am helping someone get through. {for her sake, her name has been changed.}

Let me walk you through everyday life as Ruby. Everyday she walks to school because her family has one car. She walks when its boiling hot and she walks in the snow. She walks into the school with her head down, no one says hi. She's invisable.  Ruby heads to class, she sits in the front of the room and absorbs everything the teacher says unaware of the people behind her laughing and making fun of her.  She's a genius. Straight A's. Principals List.  The day flys by until lunch. The time she hates the most.  She buys her lunch and sits there and reads and eats. occasionally people will come up and sit with her to get their friends to laugh. She knows. She gets home after school and her dad is waiting with a warm smile. She smiles and walks to her room. Her mind goes crazy, "why am I here? what have I done with my life? would people miss me if I died?" She expresses her thoughts to facebook.  11 people comment telling her how great she is. It gets her through the next day but she has the rest of the year to survive. 

I met Ruby my eighth grade year. I went to her birthday with 2 other girls, my sisters. We were the only ones there. After than I didn't see her or hear about her until just recently when the lady who drives me to school mentioned the status she posted. I decided that I wouldn't allow it. That monday I invited her to sit with me. {& this isn't tooting my own horn, I should have done this a long time ago!} she politely declined. A few days later I told her that she was "always welcome to join us!" She smiled and said "okay" 

She has yet to come join us but I will keep pushing. The reason I tell this is not to get credit because it's all the Holy Spirit in me, I did nothing. But I bring this to your attention to 1. ask for prayer for her, her family, & me to be able to keep up with inviting her to sit with me and 2. to look for people in your school who are hurting and help them before it's too late.

xox,
kirsten

change: the good, the bad, they ugly

I'll be the first to say it; change stinks.  I love my comfort zone, we're friends.  But something I recently is change helps you grow.  I'm on yearbook at my school and our theme is growth and we are focusing how change makes you grow. So often we see the bad in change, but how often do we see the good in it?

The begining of my junior year I got switched out of the small group I had been with since eighth grade due to drama.  I was told that I would "do better in a different group."  This enraged me.  I didn't want to be in this group where I barely knew they girls and the leaders.  As the year went on I grew to love both of my leaders but one specifically; elgena.  I just loved how real she was. While some of the girls didn't appreciate it, I ate up every word she said. I knew that I wanted to get to know her better.  

I just came home from dinner with her. The funny thing? I would never have met her had I not been forced to switch small groups.  The way God plans my life astounds me.  I was forced into change. But I grew so much, had I stayed in the same group I know I wouldn't have opened up to anyone about anything.  I don't even know if I would have met my best friend jenna!  I was so set on my life staying the same and staying in that group that I almost lost these two amazing women in my life.

I guess what I am trying to say is change can be scary but try to stick it out. "If God let you to it, He'll lead you through it." 

xox,
kirsten

love is an anchor

there is hope!

Oh my gosh, I have been so busy blogging hasn't even crossed my mind. With back to school, work, homework, and the craziness of life I would venture to say I haven't posted in a month? I'm sorry. Student Council is taking up a ton of time as we struggle to get prepared for the upcoming school year, I work every weekend, and life is just crazy. 

So I was reading something one of my friends posted on facebook about purity. I have worn a purity ring since the end of my sophomore year. If you don't know what a purity ring is, it's a ring that you wear where your wedding ring would go as a promise to not have sex before marriage. Anyways, I recently stopped wearing it just because. I endured all the questions like "oh my goodness, did something happen?" No, I simply took it off. I just didn't feel like wearing it anymore. But the meaning for me goes deeper, I hate waiting. I just want God to show me my perfect man, what girl doesn't? My sophomore and junior year were boy centered. I pushed God out. I told God that if he wouldn't show me my perfect man, I would find him. Which, now that I think about it, explains why no guys were genuinely interested. The ones that were interested, weren't guys I wanted to date. I knew God was up there laughing. He showed me that I am not at all capable of finding a guy, let alone the perfect one. 

So now I've made it sound like I have it all figured out. Mission accomplished right? nice try! This is the part of this story that is raw and real, and current. God isn't enough for me. A part of me died when I typed that. He never has been. Don't get me wrong, God is enough. But I still feel empty. I have never been super close with God. I feel like people who blog have life changing stories. If that's what you are looking for, save yourself the time and do something else. I am here to be real with you, my life is in shambles. I have never felt farther from God and it is probably the worst and scariest thing in the world. I'm at the point where I can learn from this or go off the deep end. If you have never been at rock bottom, and I mean way down, so far that you can barely see the light at the top; you can't comprehend how scary it is. The fact that you are so far from the light {God} that you can barely see Him. When you think you can't fall any farther down, you meet a new friend who hates church and everything about it. You can't be there to change her mind because you don't by any means have any hope left to share. 

But let me tell you, there is hope. That little glimmer of light that you can see from the bottom of the dark place you are in, it's getting closer. God will never leave you. My mom always tells me, "the only person that ever walks away from your {my & God's} relationship; is you." Life is crazy and it may get hectic but God doesn't give up on you. He is waiting to pull you out of the dark place. It doesn't get much better than that. 

xox,
kirsten

Camp Barnabas Video

As you guys know I went to Camp Barnabas this summer and had a blast and put up some pictures on my blog and if we are friends on facebook there are a plethora of pictures up there. But nothing quite captures moments like video. So this is a little video put together by one of my friends! I am in in a few times, none with my camper but you have all seen her so..
ENJOY!!

{just click on the link below}

 Camp Barnabas 2012

xox,
kirsten

SENIOR YEAR

The day has come; I registered for my senior year! Where has the time gone?! I feel like just yesterday I was registering for my freshman year! I have seen many senior classes pass through, but none that have really stuck out to me. I want to be the change! I want 2013 to be a class to remember. I want to reach my school, I want people to look back on my senior class and people to say, "wow, that will be a hard class to replace." What would someone have to do to make that kind of impression? I feel like so often senior year is all about the seniors. What about the seniors reaching out to the younger grades. Prepare them for their upcoming responsibilies. What of we were a class that reached out instead of being a class that is all about us? How big of an impact would that make? If we prepared the upcoming grades & then the tradition would continue. One class, 2013, could change our schools! It's time for us to step up, are you ready?

xox,
kirsten